A few years ago, I gave up making New Year resolutions and setting yearly goals.
Instead on the eve of every New Year, I wish/hope that I am a better person than I was the year before.
2020 kicked my ass. Starting in January 2020, I broke my foot in 3 places and was in bed for almost 3 months. In March, when I was able to get up and about, we went into the 1st lockdown. In October I got shingles in my right eye, a really bad case, so painful I could not leave my bed and I have been in pain for 2.5 months.
2020 was stressful. I’ve watched family members lose money, jobs, relationships. A very dear family member passed away. Others got COVID, broke bones and one got diagnosed with cancer and died a few months later.
2020 brought gifts. My beautiful grandson Ethan was born in February and I enjoyed a lovely visit with my perfect grandbabies Zak and Codi in September. I found the strength to launch Across Rainbows. I enjoyed summer BBQs and wine in the garden. I loved the random discussions on anything and everything. I appreciate that I was heard.
I realised that I am so blessed when it comes to my boys and my partner.
I see how loved I am and how much I love them. Family is so important.
2020 highlighted my flaws. I realised that I am not very patient. And this year tested my patience to the max.
I am prone to catastrophising. I stand in my own way. I stress easily (hence the shingles). I worry about the mental health crisis within the LGBTQ+ community homeless, domestic abuse, mean people, angry people, the environment… the list is endless.
2020 highlighted my strengths. I am a fighter and a survivor. I am kind.
I am passionate about changing the status quo. I have a voice and I use it to champion LGBTQ+ Mental Health. I take risks.
I am not afraid to speak up for those who cannot.
I believe that kindness will heal the world.
So, was I a better person in 2020 than I was in 2019?
Unlike other years, 2020 (and 3 lockdowns later), forced me to look inward. To reassess my life, to understand what’s important and what isn’t.
I chose me. I quit living my life to please other people’s expectations of what my life should be. 2020 made me a better person than I was in 2019.
In 2021, I will be even better.